Really?

1) I have something to say about the women who work at the campus coffeeshop... Picture this: it's 5 to 9, you're class stars in a few minutes, there is a line up that goes to the door, and there is one woman behind the counter, taking her sweet time waiting for a bagel to be toasted, while another woman is sitting down at a table, chatting with her friend, clearly on her break.

Okay. Maybe you don't understand the concept of fast and efficient food service, but taking a break at the busiest time of the day? Really?

And there are times when there are three women behind the counter and they're all just as equally slow! They are really oblivious to the fact that there is a line full of students that have to BE somewhere in less than 10 minutes. It should take no one 3 minutes to pour a cup of coffee. No one.

2) I wore trackpants to school yesterday for the first time since... probably grade 6. It was weird. I felt... shameful. I probably won't do that again.

3) Yesterday during one of my lectures, I was so distracted by the girl sitting in front of me. She was on her laptop, chatting away on facebook, constantly looking at her profile picture. Then she turned her head and I noticed she was wearing the most obviously fake eyelashes. You know, the kind they sell at a drugstore before Halloween? I just wondered, why?

4) This morning, on my way to school, I was walking along minding my own business, when all of a sudden out of nowhere comes this pain on my leg. I look down and see this hideous ugly ball of fur jumping around me and barking a shrill bark. This thing just BIT me!!??!! I was standing there shaking, my fists started to clench, the muscles in my thigh started to tighten as I was extremely close to kicking the dog right in it's face. I just about the step on it's head when two things stopped me: 1) a voice in the back of my mind said, "don't step on the dog - this thing doesn't know any better and you can't deal with a bloody mess this early in the morning" and 2) the owner came out. Lucky. Lucky for that ugly small Chihuahua slash some other small furry rat-like dog. The owner asked me if he'd bitten me and I said, Yeah. Why else would I be holding my leg, looking at her dog with such furry in my eyes.

Then she scolded "Hector" by saying "Don't!" and I just walked away thinking how I would get my revenge.

I get to school, my class is cancelled, so I hobble back home.

Love is in the air.

good morning saturday

So I think I've found my new favorite weekend activity.

This morning, I was strolling about town, trying to find the farmer's market, when I decided to stop for coffee at the campus coffee shop. As I'm walking along, I realize that I'd never been here on a weekend before, let alone early in the morning. The air was really crisp and fresh, the sun was shining and the whole place was so quiet. So still. The only other person I saw was a younger guy, sitting on a curb in front of a residence building. I think he may have been either really drunk or coming down off something.

Then I noticed the best part of the adventure. Among the beautiful quietness and serenity of the morning, I was all of a sudden faced with ripped beer cases, empty chip bags, garbage bins and litter scattered across the landscaped gardens, a whole role of toilet paper decorating a pine tree, and finally, a window screen strategically placed on a shrubbery.

I don't know why this whole image amused me, but I actually chuckled. I really should walk around the res buildings early on Saturday mornings more often.

i'm not sure about this...

Yesterday, I was eating my lunch in the cafeteria for the first time, studying some of my notes. It was pretty busy in there, so I decided to sit on a couch in the back of the room. It was quieter. An older looking guy sits down on the couch next to me, I think nothing of it.

As I'm finishing up, I turn my head and catch this man staring at me while eating his food. Not just casual staring, but full on spell-casting staring. He wasn't even chewing his food properly.

It was awkward, especially because of his delayed reaction time when he realized I had caught him in a stare.

Also, since last weekend, I've been getting random text messages from strangers which leads me to believe that either a) I've been giving my number out unknowingly to random people or b) someone has been giving wrong numbers to annoying chicks they pick up at parties. Due to the nature of the texts, I think it's safe to say that the latter is probably more realistic.

I really don't know why I haven't called yet. I'm sorry.

those constant little reminders

I was sitting in the school coffee shop the other morning, reading the newspaper waiting for class to start, and I pick up bits and parts of a conversation between a girl and a guy:

girl:  i didn't think you'd remember me

guy:  for sure i did

girl:  cool...

(awkward silence break)

guy:  so what are you up to this weekend?

girl:  i think i might go to the pub.  but maybe not.  maybe just pre-drink at my friend's house.

guy:  cool.  do you have an i.d.?

girl:  oh yeah totally

(rummages in bag, pulls out card and hands it to him)

girl:  it's not me, but i think it should work.

guy:  oh yeah.  it will totally work.

At this exact moment, they both stopped and turned to face me.  I guess my eyes were burning holes into the sides of their heads.  I casually coughed and looked at the time and then continued reading my newspaper.

This had never occurred to me, before that exact moment, that more than half the people in the bars or pubs or wherever, are underage!  Now everything starts to make more sense.  Now I realize why I hate every local watering hole in this town.  

Also, just a few moments ago, I received an email from some silly Off Campus Housing email list I accidentally signed up for at the beginning of the year.  A Sexy Girl's Halloween party.  At the school.  "No boys allowed".  

What are we?  17?  Oh wait, most of you are...

saturday night life lesson

1.  When you're bored on a Saturday night and decide to take a little stroll to get some fresh air and then find yourself in the line to get into a pub which plays hip hop and dance tracks from 2004 from an ipod no less, and there is a $5 cover, so you wait 15 minutes in the ATM line but are behind a drunk guy who keeps swiping his card wrong and forgetting to press the buttons, and finally you get out the cash to pay the cover and the girl hands you an "Admit One" coupon like you're at a fair and you ask her what it's for, and she says proof of payment, but no one even asks to see it so you could have skipped on paying the stupid cover in the first place, and you wait for another 20 minutes at the bar to just get a one lousy drink, and you're weaving in and out of a sea of blonde girls who are all wearing the same shirt and a mass of drunk guys in baseball caps who keep bumping into you as you maneuver your way to farthest, darkest most secluded corner of  the "pub" and mock the people dancing to the shittiest songs you've ever heard in your life while text messaging your friends in Toronto, until the creepiest oldest guy in the place comes up to you and asks you if you want to go to a house party with him, just think about it a little more,  and then stay home.

typically stereotypical

So far, the stereotypes I had in my head regarding professors have been pretty accurate.  I'll elaborate.

Economics:  male, brown slacks, running shoes, messy gray hair, big gut.  Does not care about his appearance and has an overall dry personality.

Political Science:  male, tweed sports jacket, dark chino pants, brown casual walking shoes, glasses.  Prone to go off topic and can't use Google search that efficiently.

Anthropology:  female, long braid, birkenstock sandals, khaki coloured linen pants, loose flowing shirts, ethnic jewlery.  Extremely passionate about what she teaches and pronounces names of cities and countries in the proper pronunciation. 

Spanish:  female, long colourful scarves, necklaces, thick black curly hair.  Always smiling, and speaking in a thick Spanish accent.  

Art:  female, wears a smock covered in paint, charcoal on her fingers, carries a pencil, frizzy unkept hair.  Extremely passionate about art, hates the students who took the class because they thought it would be easy, completely forgetful.  

from the four corners of the spectrum

1.  How is it that I am able to sleep through my alarm and miss my favorite classes like Spanish and Political Science, and, I've yet to miss an Economics class.  Could that be any more ironic?

2. Walking home in the rain this morning, I noticed that the river looked like the Chocolate River in Willy Wonka and got super pumped.

3.  The other night, on my way to meet up with someone at the student pub, I passed a house party.  With live fiddle music and highland dancing in the living room.  I've never wanted to crash a party so badly in my life.

4.  I heard through the grape vine that a professor at my school had gotten arrested for child porn.  I so hoped it was my Economics teacher.  It wasn't.  In fact, it wasn't a professor at all, but a well respected bishop.  Are we really that surprised though?  Really?